Wednesday, July 27, 2005

In Celebration of Marsden's Vanishing

I hereby declare a day of celebration. Rejoice, fellow citizens, the great beast that stalked the nation's newspaper, (no, not that one, the other not-as-good one) has vanished.

Lo, these past few months have been a trial for readers. Great was our fear as each Wednesday drew nigh, and we trembled like the Geats in the mead hall at the approach of the Grendel. For we knew that the morn's new light would bring no joy, but only another column by Rachel Marsden.

Yes, that Rachel Marsden. The one who claimed her swim coach raped her (he didn't) who stalked two other people, who worked for Gurmant Grewal, who posed for Republican Babe websites and calenders, who was a servant of the Dark One himself, the one known as O'Reilly.

But for two weeks now, her column has not appeared. The Canadian Cynic has noted her passing with glee, and the possibility that it had to do with this column, which appeared on her website but not in the Post. It's not really worth reading, as it's just boilerplate Muslim-bashing bullshit. The only thing interesting about it is that she seemed to think a paper, even one as right wing as the Post, would run the damn thing.

Perhaps we are premature. Perhaps Ms. Marsden has simply been put on the bench for a time by the Post, and she'll be back once she has moderated her venom output.

Or perhaps she is incapable of moderation. From the column in question:

Islam is a religion of peace. Right—and Paris Hilton is a virgin. But “moderate” Muslims—an oxymoron if ever there was one—would have us trying to reconcile the completely irreconcilable.


Evidence suggests that Muhammad was like the Courtney Love of prophets: Lacking Jesus’ crowd-pleasing talents, he resorted to the seventh century religious equivalent of microphone tossing to make a name for himself—picking up his sword and wreaking havoc on everything he could in the name of Allah.

Even after Muhammad’s death, his “peaceful” followers spent the next hundred years murdering their way to a geopolitical empire.


Western democracies have to wise up to the fact that “tolerance” of Islam is as much about "freedom of religion" as allowing your kids to trash your house while you're away on vacation.
[Iguanodon interupting here. This sentence doesn't even make sense, really.]

Maybe Canada can start with deporting all the card carrying Islamic terrorists, rather than giving them asylum here.

Then before any new immigrants set foot in Canada, they should be required to correctly answer the following question:

What do you do with an infidel?
a) Kill him
b) Fidel? I thought this was Canada!
c) Make her the newest Liberal Cabinet Minister in charge of Democratic Renewal

As I've written before, Marsden isn't even a talented writer. Frum may be a poor choice for a columnist (would you respect as independent the columns of a guy who was actually on Bush's payroll? That's like hiring a Catholic priest to write objectively on religious issues and... oh, wait, they did that too...) but he can at least string a column together.

Marsden can't even follow the standard conservative pattern for Muslim-bashing. You're supposed to acknowledge that Christians haven't been without blame, that Europeans have in fact killed a lot of people in the name of their god too. Reading this kind of bullshit makes me want to smite someone with the jawbone of an ass.

But I should not be upset. Today is a happy day. For she is gone, driven out into the wilderness, where we can only hope she will starve. Or perhaps be arrested for stalking.


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